the WaVeS

I sometimes feel like a wave tossed to and fro. Isn't there a scripture in the New Test. that talks about being tossed to and fro? I have so many highs and lows in my mood. Is it just part of being a woman.

Is it my sinful heart being discontent? We had a fabulous weekend of amazing teachings at church this past weekend. Russ and Kim Kline ministered in the prophetic - many were encouraged and challenged in the Lord. Kim's word for me was that I was "weary that sometimes leads to dreary" but the JOY of the Lord would lift me. I trust that! His word confirms the JOY is there, free to be taken hold of.

My down feeling comes from new that Heather, Lani, Maya and Adam will be moving to London by mid Aug. For at least a year, possibly up to four years. She traveled there last week and fell in love with the area. She and He are certain this move is for the best of t heir family. They found a beautiful five bedroom townhouse and reserved it. Firas leaves July 9, the day after Grace's 7th birthday.

I currently see my sister about once a month or every six weeks for several days at a time. I can't imagine how I will see her more - she swears she will stay home for long periods of time, but I cannot imagine traveling hours by plane to come here. (as often as I would like)

My sorrow is that I will miss so much of the kids growing up. Even though we are far apart n ow, about five hours, we still are very close and our kids love each other so much. If Brian and I would travel to London we couldn't afford to take all of our kiddos. Not at $1000 per ticket. We will be lucky to be able to afford a trip together.

I need to pick my chin up and find something to be joyful about. and stop dwelling on things I cannot control. and TRUST that He has it all in the palm of His hand. He is such a faithful God. Nothing happens without His knowledge. Right NOW I choose to TRUST YOU Lord, completely for every need and concern.

my weight - ECH!!!

OK, so I've been really bad about eating lately. Eating so much and such junk food. In rebellion I suppose. I hate the "ideal" size society projects about women's bodies. That being said I still think there is a weight that we all feel good at. I'm not there. I'm about 15-20 lbs over that.

So, my birthday is Labor Day weekend. I'm going to set a 10 lb loss goal for then - blogging randomly about it to motivate me and keep me accountable.

I walked this morning. Took the babies in the wagon and Grace rode her bike. It was refreshing and sweaty! Ech, sweating is not my favorite thing to do.

I'm on a mission. I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.

1 Cor 4:18

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 1 Cor 4:18

Have you ever had God's word JUMP out at you and give you amazing revelation about something. It's happening for me now, with the above scripture. so I want to share

I struggle so much with mothering, being content in it, feeling appreciated, thinking I'm doing the right think and not messing up my kids :) It's the hardest job I have ever had YET the most fun and rewarding at the same time - so so hard to explain. It's an indescribable feeling.

Yet - I am reminded of the bigger picture. God's picture. His desire for me is to be faithful in training up my children. Committing my ways to Him so that I may be an example to them of Him and His goodness.

so often, too often, I find myself resentful to my family - the never ending job and forget way too often to be a servant to them first. Lord Please help me in this area. Please fix my eyes on what is unseen - the Work You are doing in me and my children. Lord please RENEW my vision for them. And my passion to show them YOUR unfailing love. Please remind me of the unseen - what is eternal. not soccer games, t-ball, going to the park, having the coolest b-day parties or other worldly distractions - but a firm foundation of WHO YOU are and how much YOU love them. and me. Thank you God.

OK, so it turned out to be a prayer of conviction for me. more than the insight God was revealing to me about His word. I love how it is ALIVE and so refreshing. Lord, I need to be there, in the word, more often!!!

I love blogging, I can express my thoughts wholeheartedly without the condemnation of worrying about what others think. if you do not like, you just do not have to read it. :) However, I am encouraged that so many do read it - and encourage me - thank you so much!

God is so so GOOD - in every area of my life. I have so much to be thankful for. I really am!

beautiful day!

It's absolutely beautiful out today. I took a short walk with the three youngest kids. We may had to the dam later - they have a nice park there. the kids haven't been there yet this summer! It's so hard to believe they've been out of school for almost a month.

Heather's in London with her husband until Fri. I miss talking with her terribly! Sounds like her youngest two miss her also - Firas' mom and sister are watching Maya and Adam and they called my mom to come and help. So mom is on her way there now - four hours away - that sounds crazy to me! Firas's sister is 27 and his mom is in her early 50s. Oh well. Mom is so good to us! Thanks mom!

Brian came home at lunch time and I had just put Isaac and Ellie down for a nap. So we too a short nap on the couch - loved it. Things like that do not happen too often. Grace sat in the recliner and watched tv. Ezra was at camp. Which he loves! I'm glad he is happy there.

Tara got her house! Hooray! Can't wait til she moves back to PA! not long now!!!

shoppin with mom! AND glasses for another Wadding kiddo

I love shopping with mom!!! there is nothing like it. We both shop on a whim. Or used to before I had all of these kids. LOL! Mom has been in Wildwood and I was at Heathers the previous week - so it had been a while since I had seen her. I was REALLY missin her!!! I love you mom, Happy 51!!! You are beautiful inside and out!!

Grace and Ezra had an eye dr. apt. in Indiana so we shopped there. Mom's b-day is next Tues. so this was our day out. Grace joined us for lunch at the Pizza Hut buffet while Ezra returned to camp. He was thrilled because he was able to buy a game for his DS from a little yard sale $ and some $ from mom and a little more from me. Boy, those games are PRICEY!!!!

Grace has to get glasses! (sigh) poor lil gal has her momma's astigmatism (sp?) Ezra's eyes got a little worse (another big sigh) so he will get a newer prescription and new frames. I was able to pick up my new glasses and contacts. I'll have to post pics. of my new frames. Brian didn't seem to be too impressed with my choice for the brief minute I saw him, but I think he prefers me in contacts.

OK - we just got company - so I need to run!

All new!

there is something very refreshing about a new beginning. don't ya kinda wish life was like this... erase those bad memories or dumb choices and start over?

here we go
hugs
Holly